*Please email me with any personal problems you would like addressed in this column. All entries will remain anonymous.

I've fallen hopelessly in love with some one so amazing and wonderful, that they are always on my mind. I am afraid to say or do anything openly, because fraternizing at this point in time, could muck up our professional relationship. My heart is breaking, and I don't know what to do.

Dear Kind Soul-

Thank you for reaching out; it sounds like a complicated situation. As Steve Jobs stated, “Love is like a puzzle, hard to piece together, but beautiful when all the right pieces are put together.” I apologize for being so frank, but in this case, it doesn't sound like all the right pieces can be put together--at least at this point, as you say. I do applaud your self-awareness in regard to the possible detrimental effects of fraternizing. Some people never realize this and basically end up screwed (e.g. losing a license, a job etc). 

I guess my first question is whether you're even friends? If you're not even friends at this point, who's to say that this other person even wants to be friends with you or talk to you? I'm not trying to be harsh, just realistic. I can imagine the pain you would feel though if you learned that this other person had no interest in you whatsoever. 

Now if you are already friends with this person, you know that this person at least respects you and enjoys your company. There are a few options in this scenario: (1.) continue to foster the friendship, thinking that there may be hope for a relationship further down the road, (2.) force yourself to just keep it at a friendship, knowing that there's really no chance of your friendship ever turning into more or (3.) decrease your interaction with this person and move on, spending time with other loved ones and social supports. It's also easier to get your mind off of someone when you engage in other activities, so perhaps try a new hobby or activity.

I know it's cliched, but I truly believe that if it's meant to be, it will be. In this case, I am not so sure that it is meant to be, but only you will find that out. All my best with this crazy thing called love.

Breathe and relax,